Haaretz, Maariv and Yediot all agree that Dirar Abusisi is Hamas’ chief rocket designer and the mastermind behind every missile that lands inside Israel. He’s also responsible for hiding Gilad Shalit and knows where he’s imprisoned.
But that’s not all. And I’ve got the (till now) secret documents to prove it. The drawing you see is so sensitive that the Israel court, which released Abusisi’s Shabak interrogation transcript, refused to allow its publication. But I have my sources and zey hav zehr vays (as Werner von Braun might’ve once said).
Now I can report without any doubt that Abusisi is not just a rocket designer, but that from his extensive online nuclear research he has designed a Hamas nuclear bomb; or as Shimon Peres would say: “a flying Holocaust.”
This man is a veritable devil incarnate and Shabak caught him in the nick of time. Had it not nabbed him asleep on that Ukrainian railroad train, there’s no telling how much damage he might’ve done, not just to Israel, but the entire western world.
You thought Richard Reid, the shoe bomber was bad. Pshaw. Child’s play compared to the boom-boom Abusisi had designed for his good friend in Hamas, Mohammed Deif. And you know where he meant to detonate it, right? No, not on the prime minister’s office. That would’ve been too obvious for our genius engineer. No, he was going to wait till Eric Cantor and Aipac brought one-quarter of the U.S. Congress to Israel for their annual haj and drop the big one killing a ton of birds with one ‘stone,’ so to speak.
I am also trying to confirm a rumor that he was the 19th hijacker on 9/11. If my source is correct–move over Mohammed Atta, you don’t hold a candle to terror mastermind, Dirar Abusisi.
On a slightly more sober note, my Israeli friend, Ed Mad X has created a hilarious spoof of the Dirar Abusisi “confession” published in the major Israeli papers yesterday. An Israeli court released the transcript of Abusisi’s Shabak interrogation in which he confessed practically to being Hamas’ Werner von Braun (as an Israeli aerospace researcher put it in the Fresh discussion forum).
What’s most remarkable is that he developed these proficiencies, if Shabak is to be believed, entirely through The Internets!! And also with a PhD he earned online from the Internet School of Aerospace and Rocket Technology (http://www.dropthebigonenow.com).
Edo’s image puts the absolutely Bozoness of the Shabak transcript into perfect context. Here’s the original drawing which the artist used for his spoof.