Life is Hard, but Life is Hardest When You’re Dumb

I was driving and listening to my favorite local radio station, KBCS when this odd song came on the air. It sounded like a traditional country song, maybe a little bluegrass or just back country. At first, I made the lyrics out to say “Life is hardest when you’re down.” But on second thought, those lyrics didn’t make much sense: saying life is hardest when you’re down is a truism and there’d be nothing original in that. But then I realized, the vocalist really was saying the preposterous: “Life is hardest when you’re DUMB.” Then I started listening closely to the rest of the lyrics. What a put on! They were so outrageous and provocative that they made you feel like you’d just broken a delicious taboo. Anyway, I don’t know quite what to make of them, other than to say they’re just plain hilarious:

Austin Lounge Lizards
lyrics–Mark Graham
Listen Here

Life is hard, but life is hardest when you’re dumb
No joie de vivre, just endless hours of tedium
With a negative IQ you’ll be lonesome sad and blue
Life is hard, but life is hardest when you’re dumb

Life is hard, but life is hardest when you’re dumb
You wait for years, but inspiration never comes
Thoughts you don’t have remain unheard because you cannot find the words
Life is hard, but life is hardest when you’re dumb

Life is hard, but life is hardest when you’re dumb
Between your ears a dark and silent vacuum
If there’s a void behind your face
why not rent out the vacant space
Life is hard, but life is hardest when you’re dumb

Life is hard, but life is hardest when you’re dumb
Why not just lay back and smoke a bowl of opium
If being stupid is your fate just relax ’cause it’s too late
Life is hard, but life is hardest when you’re dumb

You’ll find the lyrics and other song credits at the Austin Lounge Lizards site.

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