It’s at times like this that I wish I had some of the rapier satiric wit of Sadly, No! or Jesus General. Only they could really do this justice. But hell, I’ll give it a shot (and excuse the profanity, after all, I’m channeling Sadly, No!):
The head of one of the most influential local Jewish Federation branches in the United States…admitted that the appointment of Avigdor Lieberman is “not good” in terms of public relations. He quickly added, however, that the American Jewish community must nevertheless express support for Israel’s government.
“I know Lieberman, he’s not an outsider. His views have support in Israel, even if the American Jewish community doesn’t support him,” he said.
“It’s a problem that in the press he’s been labeled a fascist, but we must tell the new [U.S.] administration in no uncertain terms: ‘He’s a minister, talk to him.’
Yeah, he may be a fascist, but he’s our fucking fascist. And what’s a fascist among friends?
And hey, Brad Sherman is always good for a pro-Israel word or thousand:
“I think it’s a good thing that Labor is in the government. That creates more of a centrist government,” Rep. Brad Sherman (D-CA) said. “I think that Lieberman needs to design his rhetoric not only for the domestic Israeli market but for the world as well.
Shorter Sherman: “It’s good that Labor is in government. Now we pro-Israel shills can use it as a fig leaf to conceal the ugliness represented by Lieberman.”
Shorter Sherman II: “Lieberman needs to remember to cool his Arab-hating jets when he flys out of Ben Gurion. Non-Israelis don’t cotton to such overt racism.”
Eliot Engel, one of Aipac’s favorite ass-kissers, is also good for a few pro-Israel laughs:
Rep. Eliot Engel (D-NY): “The people of Israel have the right to elect any government they like, and no other country, including the U.S., has the right to criticize them or to make negative remarks when Israel is the only democracy in the Middle East.
Shorter Engel: “Israel has the right to elect any goddamn fascist they goddamn well please. After all, they’re the only fucking democracy in the Middle East!”
Is it an accident that Natasha Mozgovaya only interviewed three of Israel’s best Congressional shills for this article? She wouldn’t have wanted to get an honest opinion about Lieberman, now would she?