I was just reading through the Alternet site and came to a story about a mock version of the N.Y. Times. Since I read the latter everyday and have done so for decades, that piqued my interest. When I found the Tom Friedman spoof I was hooked. This is a guy that every progressive loves to hate. Full of himself. Believes his own PR. The word bloviate was coined with him in mind. Not to mention that he’s so damn wrong about so many issues because of his rose-colored glasses.
The spoof takes Friedman to task for his support of the Iraq War, but his views of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict are equally mealy-mouthed and unconvincing (and I’ve written critiques of them).
So below I’ll quote some of the funnier passages. Keep in mind that the premise of the N.Y. Times spoof is that it is July, 2009 and the U.S. has, as it did in Vietnam in 1973, withdrawn from Iraq:
The sudden outbreak of peace in Iraq has made me realize, among other things, one incontestable fact: I have no business holding a pen…I know, you’re thinking I’m going too far. I haven’t always been wrong about everything.
…People like me have no business posing as wise men, and, more importantly, that The New York Times has no business continuing to provide me with a national platform. In any case, I have made a decision: as of today, I will no longer write in this or any other newspaper. I will immediately desist from writing any more books about how it’s time for everyone to climb on board the globalization high-speed monorail to the future. I will keep my opinions to myself. (My wife suggested that I try not to even form opinions…).
I’m not trying to beat myself up here. I’ve done that plenty already, believe me — and my wife has done the rest! But I have one question: why are newspapers like The New York Times letting people like me make fools of themselves, mislead the American people, and, worst of all, give their wives a lifetime of ammunition?
To err is human, but to print, reprint, and re-reprint error-mad humans like me is a criminally moronic editorial policy.
Nor, of course, is it only me. Just consider who populates the opinion pages of America’s top newspapers. Bill Kristol, who was actually hired by The Times long after being proven wrong on Iraq. Charles Krauthammer. Robert Novak…Fred Barnes. The list goes on and on of officially-approved wise men (and a woman or two) who never once doubted that Iraq had vast stockpiles of W.M.D.s…
We were all wrong again and again — and the consequences were devastating. Can anyone tell me why any of us should ever be asked, let alone paid, for our opinions ever again?
Unlike Ehud Olmert’s recent interview in which he conceded the correctness of the last forty years of the anti-Occupation movement’s political analysis, this is the column Friedman should write, but never will. The guy has too much hubris to admit his grievous error.
The DeBeers diamond ad was so chilling I just had to include it here. This is just brilliant political satire worthy of being disseminated far and wide. I immediately thought of David Bloom and his work with Adalah NY to publicize the harmful affects of Lev Leviev’s diamonds on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.
i got a copy on 59th street of the print paper. it should be on every coffee table in america. it is a masterpiece.
Actually, it was entirely reasonable to suspect that Iraq had WMDs. (As “Blowback” author Chalmers Johnson once joked, “We know they have WMDs – we have the receipts.”) But there was everything wrong with not letting the UN inspectors do their job and not believing them if they gave Iraq a clean bill of health.
This was GREAT. A clandestine paper in New York city!!!! Wow! How much the citizens can do to inform others and prevent the govt from feeding lies and!
And Mr Friedman, a pompous person if there was one, got what he deserved.
And here is a short video from NYCity street..
http://vimeo.com/2215007
You are wrong, Richy, plenty of Jewish liberals/progressives like Thomas Friedman, including myself. Just look at his sales numbers and journalism awards.
You are just jealous that he succeed where you have not. He has been able to criticize Israel while still getting the approval of liberal Jews and Arabs.
Richard S., I am generally a fan of yours, but I must say that Mr. Michael W. is correct. You do sound very jealous of the success of Mr. Friedman. I do not usually agree with Mr. Friedman, but I always find his writing to be thought provoking. Rather than carp of ad hominem attacks, it would behoove you to stay on point. (Please receive this as a helpful suggestion from a fan.) Best regards in your future endeavors. Art Sturdevant
@Mikey: That you might like Tom Friedman I have no doubt. That you would actually BE a progressive Jew I find laughable. By what standard are you progressive? Do Friedman’s sales numbers make him progressive?
Why should I be jealous of Tom Friedman? Do you think my goal in life is to write a newspaper column for the Gray Lady? And if gaining his fame means having to shill for the Iraq war and telling Israelis and Palestinians that they’d know how to make peace if they only learned to play golf–well, I’m perfectly content to be right where I am writing this blog.
Friedman has criticized Israel? When? Not for 10 or 20 yrs. at least.
@Art Sturdevant: I am not jealous of Tom Friedman in any way, shape or form. I disagree with his ideas. He’s a washed up pundit who hasn’t had a fresh idea in years. Why would I be jealous of someone who last had a creative journalistic thought half a generation ago?
You don’t what “ad hominem” means. It means disparaging his person. I haven’t called him fat or ugly, merely banal. And his ideas are wrong & if you’d read the original spoof you’d find out precisely why & how they’re wrong. If you want to find more criticism of his ideas you can Google his name at this site & find other pieces which have gone into more specifics.
I’m pro-choice, pro-gay marriage/civil union, pro-legalization of drugs, pro-creating a Palestinian state in West Bank and Gaza, don’t like settlers, ummm …. what else? Oh right, anti-Iraq war from the start(if you want to know why, I’ll tell you later).
You have to acknowledge that he’s at least a lefty in Israeli politics. He’s against the occupation. Just because he doesn’t fit in your definition of the a Lefty (BHLevi probably doesn’t fit it as well) doesn’t mean that he’s not a progressive or a liberal or a lefty.
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I read your critic of his column about Warren Buffet’s acquisition of an Israeli high tech company.
You are comparing a journalist’s economic analysis of Israel to Warren BUFFET’s judgement.
You provide numbers from the 90’s while forgetting that Israel just absorbed hundreds of thousands of Russian immigrants.
You said that having such a large high-tech sector is a bad thing. What else could they make or grow? Watermelons? It’s the Middle East! Who would have thought that there could be a high tech sector?
Even with the occupation and the military budget, having such a high standard of living is amazing. After the 2006 war, the Israel economy shot right back up, hence proving that it is “robust.” Also, it has relatively been unaffected by the credit crunch.
Friedman’s was comparing Israel and Iran economically. You haven’t even talked about Iran. This is about the struggle between two Middle Eastern countries. How is Israel not above Iran economically?
One more thing,
WELCOME TO DIGG!
DIAMONDS ARE A GIRL’S BEST FRIEND!!!!!!!!! REALLY!!!
At least, diamonds are a better friend than am I!!! But then I digress…..
PS. Russ Feingold for Chairman of the U.S. Senate Committee on Foreign Relations (replacing Biden)
@Michael W:
Not at all. He’s a centrist, if that. Very comfortable in the Kadima context. Probably even liked Ariel Sharon as PM. That’s nowhere near “lefty” in the Israeli context. You’re confusing the Friedman of From Beirut to Jerusalem, written decades ago, w. the current smug, self-satisfied Friedman who suggests golf as a means to bring peace to Israel Palestine.
“Against the occupation.” What does that mean? Does it mean he’s ready to end it right now? No, of course not. Then I guess he’s not really against it; or perhaps we should say he’s half against it & half not quite yet ready for it to end.
As for YOU being progressive: forget U.S. politics. That’s not what interests me. ANyone can be progressive in U.S. politics yet still be right wing when it comes to Israel.
What’s yr view of the Lebanon war? What’s your view of the Occupation? Are you ready to call for its end right now or are you one of those who doesn’t see Israel as having a partner? Are you in favor of negotiating with Hamas? Ending the Gaza siege? Giving up the Golan for peace w. Syria?
@Michael W:
That’s not very precise. Of course having a high tech sector isn’t a bad thing. It’s an excellent thing. But to single out the high tech sector as Friedman has done & say it will be Israel’s salvation & that the success of Israel’s entire economy should rely on high tech is a BIG MISTAKE. Israel needs a diversified economy and doesn’t have one.
@Michael W:
Tell that to the 33% of Israelis who live below the poverty line and the similar number of children who live in poverty. You’ve been reading too much of Bibi’s tough love economics propaganda.
The Tel Aviv stock exchange lost a huge amt. of its overall value last week. Lev Leviev’s African Israel Corp., one of the nation’s biggest companies, is now worth 20% of what is was worth last January. “Not affected by the credit crunch?” Hardly. This is foolish boosterism. Every country in the world is going to be affected by the economic meltdown. Anyone who tells you “my country is relatively unaffected” is either a liar, a con artist, or deluded. If I were charitable I’d say you represent the latter.
“Israel needs a diversified economy and doesn’t have one.”
It doesn’t have anything to diversify itself with.
“Tell that to the 33% of Israelis who live below the poverty line.”
You are forgetting that it’s the middle east. The ultra orthodox and the Arabs are mostly under the poverty. What could the state do? How can they make the men to stop studying Torah all the time and stop the women from having a dozen kids.
“The Tel Aviv stock exchange lost a huge amt. of its overall value last week.”
Yea, you are leaving out the numbers. Compare it the US markets this year. Key word: “relatively”.
And no, I don’t like Bibi. I’m more of a Labornik.
“I’m …… pro-creating a Palestinian state in West Bank and Gaza” – Michael W
! The mind boggles.
Im pro-creating a Palestinian state between the Jordan River and the Meditteranean, and allowing the zionists to move wherever they want out of Palestine. I would think that most countries would welcome small amounts of zionists for the obvious economic benefits. In addition, I think the Jews would welcome sacrificing a problematic nation state for the cause of world peace. If successful, it could lead to the elimination of the nation state, which has caused so much bloodshed
@Michael W:
Ridiculous. Clearly you’re not an economic planner and know nothing about business development.
The same tired argument has been offered here by other pro-Israel apologists. And the same arguments are raised in the U.S. to justify our inability to end poverty in this country. It’s always the fault of the impoverished that they are poor. But you’ve added the ignorant and racist insult that Israeli Arabs are poor because men can’t keep their pricks in their pants & women won’t use birth control. That’s not very original, but it does take one’s breath away. There are hundreds of reasons why Israeli Arabs are poor. Large families isn’t exactly a deft explanation considering the institutitonal racism that confronts Israeli Arabs in every aspect of their personal & public lives.
As for the TSE being so protected from the international economic storm: you’re dead wrong. The exchange has been as hammered as every other major exchange. The rose colored glasses thing you’ve been affecting isn’t very persuasive. Try truth & candor for a change instead of cant & cheerleading in talking about Israel.
@Linha:
I’m finding your comments more and more offensive. Pls. review my comment rules and if you can’t follow them don’t comment here. Any more of this crap and you’ll be moderated or banned.
I’m way late in commenting on this post. I just came across it but I couldn’t resist.
I really liked Thomas Freidman. It’s really too bad if he changed that much.
I sure can’t comment on him because I haven’t read his columns in the N.Y. Times. All I know is his book ‘From Beirut to Jerusalum’, which I read +/-10 years ago. I loved the book. It is the first book I read that changed my perception of Isreal and the occupied territories, of the whole middle east conflict.
Too bad … another lost soul!